For today's and next week’s episodes, we have another 2-parter for you as Dee & Sam share their two daughters’ preemie birth stories. You’ll hear these two soulful parents share some pretty incredible details about their two hospital births. In this episode, labor begins prematurely, several weeks before the due time, and soon after one of the biggest snowstorms New York has seen in many years. I might add it happens all while Dee’s husband, Sam, is having fun down in Austin for South by Southwest with his brother, and he makes it back in the nick of time. Hear how Dee’s best friend comes up to visit while Sam’s away thinking they’ll get some girl time, but little did they know her girlfriend would be a labor support partner until Sam could get on the next flight to return! Due to the amount of bleeding she had, they ended up admitting her earlier than they normally would. Dee’s water breaks right around the time that Sam arrives from the airport, and her contractions immediately get much stronger, which leads her to opt for the epidural, which she always thought she would opt for. Hear how she details the ways in which having a doula made a huge difference in how her labor went, especially in light of having so much back labor due to the baby not quite being in an optimal position. She also describes how quickly the pushing stage went for her, and Sam will give a few of his reflections on being present for the birth.
Episode Topics:
Taking birth class during pregnancy
Importance of a teamwork approach for baby care, taking time for yourself to get away, take a breather from the relentless work of parenting
Birth story #1:
Sam leaves for SxSW Austin, TX
Huge snowstorm hits NYC
Dee’s dear friend, Kelly, comes to visit
Dee has bloody show and instinctively decides she’s in labor
Hospital admits her because she progresses from 1 to 2 cm in 1 hour, bleeding a lot and for antibiotics due to being GBS positive
Doctor & doula arrives, doc tells her she can go home, but Dee isn’t comfortable going home without Sam there and given all the snow
Lots of back labor/pain due to baby being in posterior position
Sam arrives straight from airport immediately after Dee’s water breaks
Laboring on all fours (even with epidural)
Benefits of hiring their doula (Erica)
Pushing baby out in only 3 pushes
Delaying cord clamping
Reviewing class materials for birth #2
Sam’s reflections on birth (being surprised by not getting faint at sight of blood, enjoying the teamwork of labor, the surprising emotions after birth)
Resources:
Happiest Baby on the Block* (you’ll learn about the “5 S’s” from this if you take birth class)
Birth Matters NYC Childbirth Education Classes (Astoria, Queens)
*Disclosure: Links on this page to products are affiliate links; I will receive a small commission on any products you purchase at no additional cost to you.
Transcript:
Lisa: 00:00
You're listening to the Birth Matters Podcast Episode 21.
Dee: 00:03
I went into the bathroom and it was a lot, and I just knew. I was like, "Kelly!" and she was like, "Oh, God, what? What?" And I was like, "I'm in labor, I'm in labor. I know I'm in labor. Like, we got to go to the hospital." And she just, like, her face—it was hilarious because she was like, "OK, OK," and she grabbed her phone and she texted Sam. What'd she say? "More blood."
Sam: 00:28
It was like the worst text she could have sent me because, like, I think everything was like fine. It was okay. But clearly things needed to happen. But she was like, "More blood. Get on flight."
Dee: 00:39
And that was it. And then never responded again.
Sam: 00:41
And then, like, radio silence. I was like, "What?"
Lisa: 00:53
Hey there! And welcome to the Birth Matters Show. I'm your host. Lisa Greaves Taylor, founder of Birth Matters NYC Childbirth Education and Labor Support. This show is here to lessen your overwhelm on the journey into parenthood by equipping and encouraging you with current best evidence info and soulful interviews with parents and birth pros. Please keep in mind the information on this show is not intended as medical advice or to diagnose or treat any medical conditions. If you like the show, we'd be so grateful if you'd write a review. Wherever you're listening to this, you might just get a shout out on social media or on the podcast if you do.
Lisa: 01:32
For today's and next week's episodes, we have another two-parter for you. As Dee and Sam share their two daughters' preemie birth stories, you'll hear these two soulful parents share some pretty incredible details about their two hospital births. In this episode, labor begins prematurely several weeks before the due time, and soon after one of the biggest snowstorms New York has seen in many years, I might add. It happens all while Dee's husband, Sam, is having fun down in Austin for South by Southwest with his brother, and he makes it back in the nick of time. Hear how Dee's best friend comes up to visit while Sam's away, thinking they'll get some girl time. But little did they know her girlfriend would be a labor support partner until Sam could get on the next flight to return, due to the amount of bleeding she had. They ended up admitting her earlier than they normally would. Dee's water breaks right around the time that Sam arrives from the airport and her contractions immediately get much stronger, which leads her to opt for the epidural, which she always assumed she would opt for. Hear how she details the ways in which having a doula made a huge difference in how her labor went, especially in light of having so much back labor due to the baby not quite being in an optimal position. She also describes how quickly the pushing stage went for her, and Sam will give a few of his reflections on being present for the birth.
Lisa: 02:55
Before we jump into the story, I want to let you know that this episode is brought to you by Birth Matters NYC's Childbirth Education Classes. If you live in the New York City area, the best way to build your confidence and prep for an amazing birth and entry into parenthood and to connect with other expectant parents to build your very important support system is to attend group childbirth education classes. You'll spend quality time with your labor support partner in our comfy Astoria living room classroom as you prepare for not only birth but also for your best possible postpartum recovery and wellness, as well as early parenting with classes on breastfeeding and newborn care techniques. Classes often book up about 1 to 2 months in advance, so be sure to grab your spot on the early side. For more information and to sign up, visit birthmattersnyc.com.
Lisa: 03:45
Okay, without further ado, let's jump in.
Lisa: 03:48
Welcome to the Birth Matters Podcast. Today I have two Birth Matters alumni from going on almost three years ago, right guys?
Dee: 03:57
Yeah.
Lisa: 03:57
I have Dee and Sam with me today. Welcome to the show.
Dee: 04:04
Hi Lisa.
Sam: 04:04
Thanks for having us.
Lisa: 04:04
Why don't you share maybe what you do for a living and then also share how—where you are in your parenting journey, how old your two little ones are.
Dee: 04:12
Sure.
Sam: 04:14
I am a line producer for Viacom, and I specifically oversee production for MTV and Logo. For those who don't know, a line producer is a production—basically a project manager of sorts, so I manage the budgets and oversee, sort of like the A to Z production of digital content for, like I said, for Viacom, MTV and Logo. And Dee also works at Viacom. We meet at MTV news years ago.
Dee: 04:46
Yes, we did. Yeah, I was his superior at MTV News. And we were really good friends. And we would hang out all the time. And I felt like he was like, you know, like my buddy. But he was five years younger, so I was like, "Well, I mean, it will never work." And, you know, lo and behold, here we are. But we—I do work at Viacom as well, but in a different division. We sort of split off in, like, 2010. I moved into the special events division of Viacom. So I handle all the events large and small for Viacom, including Paramount and Nickelodeon and MTV and VH1, and Comedy Central and all the other properties underneath. Last week, I did a 12-person board dinner. And then in two weeks, I'll be doing a 3000 person holiday party. So it just sort of runs the gamut. Yeah, but yes, very interesting when you're a parent doing these kinds of things.
Lisa: 05:40
Indeed. Wow. Yeah. I loved hearing—when we went to Lincoln Center to the Metropolitan—no, we didn't go to the opera. We went to the ballet, but I think you said you had just done an event there. And I love seeing some of the pictures of the different events you do. It's really, really fancy.
Dee: 05:59
Yes, and it makes for a lot of really interesting pumping stories. Places that I pumped. Definitely. I've pumped in, like, Drakes private bathroom, and just a lot of different restaurants and, you know, little closets and different venues. So, you know, by any means necessary, I made sure to pump. Yeah. So it's interesting.
Lisa: 06:26
Cool. And so where are you in your parenting journey?
Sam: 06:29
So we have a two-and-a-half year old, right? Emma is two-and-a-half, and Luna is our newest, and she is just a little over six months old. And so we are in the thick of it in our parents journey. In the thick of toddler—the challenges and blessings of toddlerhood. Every day is a new day as I'm sure anyone who has a two-year-old listening to this knows.
Dee: 06:58
Every hour is a new hour. How about that?
Sam: 06:58
Sure. And then, you know, just redoing the—doing the whole new one thing over again was an interesting journey as well. Definitely. You think, like, "Oh, we got this." I remember thinking before the second one was born, like, "Bring it on! Let's go, let's do it." Yeah, and we just got, like, just really floored, I think, in the beginning, being like "Oh, wow, This is really challenging." And like, even if you know the motions to go through, like, our kids are very different. Which was also another thing that I thought I had figured out like, "Oh, you know, they don't have—they don't really have personalities this young," or they don't, you know, like, there it's really—"Everything that we're putting into it, we're shaping their reality," and that just totally wasn't the case. Like we can certainly guide and, like, set the great habits and schedules and things like that. But, like, our children were very different in their early months.
Dee: 08:04
Yes for sure.
Sam: 08:06
But we're in a great place now, you know. Like I said, I think the biggest challenge is having a toddler. But now Luna's the smiley, innocent bystander who just sort of hangs out and has a good time, and Emma is just—you know, every day is a new day, like I said.
Dee: 08:23
Yeah. And as I was telling you before we started the podcast is that, I've always been pretty organized and a really good, you know, list taker, and kind of get things done. And, you know, it's been almost three years that I've had written down to write down Emma's birth story because, I mean, because I'm gonna forget. And then when Luna was born, it was like, "Okay, this time I'm gonna get on top of it. I'm gonna write it down." And here we are, not having written it down. But being to talk to you about it is also a bit of blessing and sort of, you know, not coincidental. Just, perfect timing.
Lisa: 08:59
Great. Well, I don't know if you wanna lead into your birth story with any of your pregnancy journey, or your decision to take birth classes. What was that like? And how did you find classes? And I don't know. What kind of things did you do to equip yourself for birth?
Dee: 09:15
So, for Emma, the pregnancy overall was pretty good. I was a little bit nauseous, and I had this—had a lot of funny stories going into the final months of that pregnancy. But one of the things that has ushered us into parenthood and has been so comforting is this community that—not only in Astoria, but just, you know, in this life, you know, you are a parent-to-be, and people who are parents embrace you and give you advice and, you know, everyone sort of networks. And so that's exactly what happened. A dear friend of mine, Chelsea, who lives in Astoria said that she had taken a great birth class and I need to take it with this Lisa Taylor and she's great. She runs it out of her home. And so we thought, "Well, that sounds great to us." And it was over a weekend, which worked with our schedules, because our days could be really long and we travel. And so we signed up, and it was really interesting. You know, we got to go to your house and be able to sit with, you know, I think it was like five or six other couples, one of which, A,J and Kate, who we're really, really close with now. And the birthing class—it was really interesting. I know that Sam was—you know, a participant, and really wanted to, you know, take it very seriously because he, you know, was planning on—no, I don't know, but I just feel like he really was excited about it. Were you excited about it?
Sam: 10:51
Yeah.
Dee: 10:52
OK, great.
Lisa: 10:52
Well, and, Sam, you have stayed in my memory as one of the most reflective, soulful— both of you as a couple, actually—people. You were inquisitive. You were so thoughtful and soulful in your questions. And I just loved that because I felt like you were entering into this experience in a more—well again to—I'm overusing the word thoughtful. But that's just the best word that keeps coming to me. Just in a very—I don't want to say cautious or careful, but in a reflective way. That's important, I think. I guess acknowledging that this is a momentous, huge experience in your life, you know. And so many people don't get that, don't realize that, I think, and just kind of are like, "OK, it's a checklist of like, I got to do the birth class, I've got to do this," and but, you know, to kind of rush through things without really thinking about it. I so appreciated that about both of you.
Sam: 11:52
I appreciate that. I don't really see any other—like I so—it's just such a part of me to, like, I do, like, sort of over-analyze a lot of stuff and like, I am, I deeply self-reflective, for sure. And I think because of that, like, I feel like I have to be such a participant in so many things, you know, that I do in my life. I think I'm just—I'm not really like a halfway in kind of guy, so yeah, I don't know. I mean, I think that—I can't imagine going into—this certainly isn't...I mean, everyone has their own journey and everyone makes it work how they want to. So I would say just, as, like, a blanket statement, as we talk through this: like, nothing that we say is judgmental towards anyone else's journey. But I can't imagine going into it without the education that we received, whether it was from you or books or friends and family, like I just—if you're just winging it, like, that seems so terrifying to me, you know. And again, people make that work.
Sam: 12:58
But, like, I remember my sister, I can—I was sort of, I mean, this is a little contradictory of what I just said, but I was—I wasn't reading the books. I wasn't on top of the books and stuff that my sister was sending us. My sister is three years older. She lives in Arizona. She has two kids who are...
Dee: 13:18
Ten and seven.
Sam: 13:19
Ten and seven, and they're just like—every single stage of their upbringing, I've been so—I admire my sister and brother-in-law in how they've done everything, because the kids, they were good sleepers, and then they were well behaved toddlers. And now they're just super respectable ten- and seven-year-olds. And so we were constantly looking to my sister Katie for advice, and Jeff, and she was like, you know, "Sam, like, did you read the book yet? Did you read—" and in this particular instance, it was like "Happiest Baby on the Block" or something, which was like a huge tool for us in the first few months, and she—I just like, I'll never forget, she texted me and she said one of the most terrifying moments—maybe "terrifying" seems like a strong word for it. But like, it can be a really scary feeling to come home from the hospital and just be there with that baby and not know what's next. Like, what's the next step? And even if it's a simple as like, how to swaddle, how to get the baby to calm down and she's like, "Knowledge is power. Like, empower yourself right now by reading the book. Here, I'll make it easy for you. Here's the pages, like here's the Cliff Notes of what you need to read so it wasn't such a daunting task. I just always pass that advice on, because it can feel—like how isolating, you know, to come home. You have—you're at the hospital, you have all the support in the world, the nursing staff, and everyone is there to, like, field every single question that you have, and to help you physically do so many different things. And then you leave, and it can feel like you're living in total isolation from the world just even for brief moments in time. But like the more you—knowledge you can gather, and the more you can educate yourself, it's just, it's deeply empowering. For sure.
Dee: 15:19
Yeah, And I think, you know, through the class I mean, I remember I learned so much stuff that I had never heard of before: delayed court clamping and, you know, asking for the Foley balloon, and all these things that I had no idea. Just a lot of the videos that we saw. I mean, those were the first times that I had watched a birth. You know, and so the class was really the first time—and it was probably about...it ended up being about three weeks before she was born because she came three weeks early, but—it was the first time that we really got into a deeper dialogue about how we were going to go into this together.
Dee: 15:52
And one thing that's really poignant, that I want to say, and this is mostly directed towards spouses, or it doesn't necessarily have to be just the men but any spouse that doesn't feel ready. I remember it was one of the first few days of Emma—when we were home with her. And it was the middle of the night, and Sam would always get up, every single solitary time I was nursing. He would get up, he changed her diaper, gave me the baby, and then he'd take the baby and put her down and swaddle her and rock her and do all of those things. And we would always chat while I was nursing, and he's like, you know, he's like "I have no idea what I'm doing, and neither do you"—because I didn't, I didn't know either—"And it's like, besides nursing her, there's nothing that I can't do with this baby. You know, there's nothing that I can't learn that you're learning that we can't do together." So I think there's this misconception that men can't do, you know, they don't—they're hopeless during the newborn stage, and that's not true. It's like, besides giving your breast for that milk, there's a lot that you can do, and most of the time you're learning together. You know, I didn't grow up with babies or kids, and so I had no idea how to change a diaper. And I learned in your class. I didn't know how to swaddle. I learned in your class. I didn't, you know, all these things that we were kind of on this journey together—was also empowering to know that it's not just the woman's place to know all these things; we're on the journey together, and we helped each other out that way.
Sam: 17:21
I mean, it's certainly like there's a lot of, like, gender stereotypes attached to this and, like, societal sort of norms that we've set for ourselves that I think there's obviously—like, as a mother you have—there's inherent...
Sam: 17:39
Yes, biological instinct.
Sam: 17:40
Biological instincts. But one thing I'm always floored by that I've heard, like, way too often from guys is like, "Well, there's nothing I can do." Like there's—if their wife is nursing, that it's like, their baby's entire existence is essentially broken down in their head into like, if the baby is only on the breast, or like doing something else with the mother, like, I don't understand. You know what I mean? Because it's also just like an insane commitment and amount of work to breastfeed. And like, to be like—I don't know. I just I think that that's just such a silly statement.
Dee: 18:14
Yeah.
Sam: 18:16
Yeah, that's great advice, and it's a reason why in class, I say, "My recommendation for you is that you talk as a couple about how you're gonna divvy up the responsibilities. And women who are breastfeeding are responsible for the input. Partners, you're responsible for the output—meaning, like, everything else that's not breastfeeding, at least in the early weeks. That's the recommendation."
Dee: 18:39
Yeah.
Lisa: 18:39
Because you're absolutely right, Sam. There is so much that partners can help with. And it's a great opportunity to bond with your baby too, right?
Sam: 18:47
Absolutely.
Dee: 00:00
Yes.
Sam: 18:48
Because I think that there's a snowball effect that happens where the more you're not doing that bonding, the—again, it goes back to just educating yourself and, like, the less time you spend with that baby, aside from not forming just like a natural bond with them, you're not practicing.
Dee: 19:07
Right.
Sam: 19:07
So, like, what happens down the road from that is that, you know, if Dee—if I weren't participating, then, like, Dee would be reluctant to, like, leave and go on. weekend vacation, or do these things, because then she thinks, "Well, Sam doesn't know what's going on with the kids." Like, if you're not staying up on top of this stuff, then that's a valid concern.
Dee: 19:31
Yes.
Sam: 19:32
You know, and we've been talking a lot. Like that stuff becomes so important later, like our most recent struggles have been, like, really trying to find time. Like we've been feeling so sort of overwhelmed and just like trapped in this apartment, you know, like it's just like New York living and not having a backyard to go into. And, you know, some of those things may just be fantasy, like if we had them, would it really change things? Or are we just in, like, the throes of parenthood? I don't know, but it's...
Dee: 20:05
If we weren't going through it together, I just like—I have no idea where our relationship would be, because it's really hard work. We talk about this all the time. We're constantly in communication about it—it's not that it's the work is hard, it's just relentless. It's relentless work and it doesn't end. And tomorrow is a new day and you're going to do it all over again. If we weren't together, I just don't know how—I don't know how we would be feeling about one another. That's all.
Sam: 20:32
Totally. And just to finish my thought, we've been talking about how important it is for—not only for us to find time to do things, just with each other as a couple, but also to find time for the other to get out, to go on, like I said, what is like a weekend vacation, to just disappear for a little bit, because it's super healthy. And again you can't—if you're not doing it as a team, you're both not really like working on the same level. You can't feel empowered to leave the other person, because if they're not sort of on the same level as you, then if you're off taking a weekend vacation and you don't trust that I'm doing well with the kids, you're not relaxing. Know what I mean? You're stressing.
Lisa: 21:15
You're resenting as well.
Sam: 21:19
Yeah, yeah. So I think all that all that stuff is really important.
Dee: 21:22
Yeah. Yeah. So going to the birth stories.... So we had taken your class. I think it was—yeah—about three weeks before I ended up going into labor, which was extremely unexpected. So I remember I was a little—I think I was 36 weeks, and Sam had a trip to Austin, Texas, for South by Southwest Music Festival. He was going for work, but was staying for the rest of the week because his brother lives there. And it was, like, sort of a tradition that him and his brother go and, you know, just be at the festival. And so we had sort of made an agreement that we would check with the doctor before he left to see how I was progressing, if at all, and if it was safe enough for him to leave. And it was a Friday, and we went into the doctor and she checked and she was like, "You know, you can go. You should go." And he was supposed to leave on....
Sam: 22:22
She actually said, "You're not having the baby. You're not having the baby anytime..." like—what did she say? "You're gonna go full term. I think you're gonna go full term. So, Sam, you're good to go."
Dee: 22:33
Yeah. And he was supposed to leave on, like, a Monday or a Tuesday. But there was a huge snowstorm coming into New York, so he ended up leaving, like, Sunday night or something like that, I don't quite remember the day. But regardless, there was a huge snowstorm on, and I remember going into—I went into work on a Monday and left early because the snow storm was coming in, you know, projecting like tons of snow. And I came home and I was like, prepared to be in here for a few days. And it snowed and work was closed for three days. And I was in here by myself for three days. Me and my baby Emma in my belly. And I—now looking back on it, realize what an incredible moment in time that was for me, because it was the last time I was ever going to be without a child. And I remember being in here, and I was putting together her room, and I remember I had these—this is so random. I had these cassette tapes that my mother had given me, and she was like, "Do you want these? What are these?" And I had them here, and I had borrowed like a cassette player because I was like, "I'm just gonna listen to these and them throw them away," and it ended up being all these, like tapes from college and, like, high school and stuff. And I went through this whole emotional journey of, like, my life, and like, remembering whenever I was a teenager or in college and moved to New York and all these things, and I was crying, and I just remember thinking like, "How's my life's gonna change?" Anyway, the point being is that I'm snowed into this apartment. My mother kept asking me like, you know, "What's gonna happen if you go into labor?" and I thought, "I'm not going into labor because I just was at the doctors.'" So that was the Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday. Friday I had a doctor's appointment. So I went. I, like, shuffled my way in, and I...
Sam: 24:32
In the snow?
Dee: 24:33
In the snow. And Sam was still gone.
Lisa: 24:36
Was that the snowstorm where we got like two-and-a-half feet or something? Yeah. Yeah, that was like the biggest...
Sam: 24:41
I couldn't believe that I made it out. I was, like, desperate to, like, get on, like, trying to figure out the flights and everything. I just remember [inaudible] the snow was coming down...
Dee: 24:49
So much. Yeah, it was...it was nuts. And so one of my childhood friends who had grown up with since I was five—and she's been through everything with me. She is my sister, just the closest person to me, really—and she, that week, had said to me, "You know what? I have 36 hours. I'm gonna drive up there." She has a son. She lives in Pittsburgh. I'm from Pittsburgh. And she said, you know, "I'm gonna drive up there. You know, we've been friends for 30 plus years. I need to see you pregnant, like, I'm coming up there for 36 hours driving on Friday night and leaving Sunday morning at 6 a.m."
Dee: 25:26
And I, you know, was super excited cause Sam was away. We were gonna have a long time together, and we were gonna do all these things that we used to do when we were growing up, and like, she was gonna help me organize my closet. So I went to the doctors' at that Friday in the snow. They checked me and I said to them, I was like, "I'm not having a baby this weekend, right?" And she goes, "No, no, no, Just like I said, you're going full term. I really do think so." She's like, "You're not....Nothing's going on." So Friday night, my friend Kelly comes, and we make plans for the whole weekend that Saturday, what we're gonna do, you know, organize the closet and we're gonna, I don't know, all these girly things we were gonna do.
Dee: 26:08
And Sam's at South by Southwest, his shoot is done, and he's just partying his face off, which is apropos for the story, because Saturday we start going through the closet, and Kelly—Kelly's her name—and Kelly opened everything up, and she's like, "Oh my God, Dee, have you packed your hospital bag yet?" And I said, "No," I said, "Lisa said I should pack at least like three weeks or four week before, just in case, but I haven't done it yet." I said, "So you know, take these things out and just put them over there. in a pile, because I'll just—I'll pack later whenever you leave." So we started going through stuff and I wasn't feeling well, just, like wasn't feeling like myself. And throughout the whole pregnancy, I had a lot of energy, and, you know, I felt pretty good. So that day I just was like, "I think I'm coming down with something. I just don't feel well. I'm gonna lay on the couch here while you go through the closet." So we had started, you know, she had started taking everything out, putting piles all around the apartment. There was laundry happening. I mean, everything was kind of taken apart. And I remember thinking, like, "I think I feel a little bit crampy." You know, "I feel a little bit crampy."
Dee: 27:14
And I went to the bathroom and there was blood. And I thought—what's interesting, Lisa, is because I did not get sick. I wasn't scared at all, because I remember learning about the mucus plug and remember learning about the bloody show and all that stuff. So I felt empowered in that moment. And I didn't know until months later that Kelly was terrified because she had no idea that blood was a part of this process. So I just was like, "Oh, I'm bleeding a little bit, you know, this—something's going on." So I texted both my OB and my doula, and they both said that there was nothing to worry about, that there was probably my uterus just, you know, getting ready for birth or shifting or something of the sort. And I just was like, "I don't know. I don't feel right," you know.
Dee: 28:09
And Kelly —before this even happened that night, Friday night, when she arrived, she said to me, she's like, "Dee, we have been through so much together. Do not go into labor this weekend. You better not go into labor while I'm here, like, I'm gonna die. I have to leave Sunday morning like you can't go into labor." I was like, "I'm not gonna go into labor," like, "It's not happening." So then I went to the bathroom and there was more blood. And I called Sam and I was like, "So..." and he's in in line at, like, waiting to get into a club or some show.
Sam: 28:40
Concert, yeah.
Dee: 28:41
Yeah, he was going to a concert. And I was like, "When does your flight get in?" And this is like Saturday, like early afternoon. And he's, you know, said the next day, at night. Sunday night. And I was like, "Well," I was like, "I think you should look at other flights, because I think I might be in labor." And, like, at this point, like, what was your ...?
Sam: 29:00
I mean, she was like, yeah, she's like, "Just check out the options, like, just so we know, like I don't know what's going on. I'm not feeling well." And I was just thinking, like, "There's no way..." I mean, of course I'm gonna look into this, but, like, just, "There's no, there's no way that this is happening."
Lisa: 29:15
The doctor said it's not happening!
Lisa: 29:17
The doctor said. The doctor said we're fine.
Sam: 29:21
So I called the airline and they were like, "We can, you know, we can get you out"— like, basically I would have had to leave right then, because, like, my all my stuff was at my brother's house, which was like a 30-minute journey to get to his house, and then I would have to pack that up and get to the airport. There was like a flight that I could take. I would have had to leave right then and go straight to the airport. It wasn't even possible for me to make the next flight. And I think like that the later flight was sold out, and then they were like, "Otherwise, we can get you out at, like, 6 a.m." So I call her back and give her the news.
Dee: 29:54
So at this point, Kelly is corresponding with Sam and I....
Sam: 30:01
Because I'm like, "Kelly. What's the deal? Like, how serious is this?" And she was like, being a little, I think that at the time I was, like, still just, I think I was in denial, I was just like, "She's being so dramatic about this." She's like, "I don't know, Sam, like, I really think you should get on a flight." And I'm like, "I'm not gonna go through the motions of this, like, I'm about to see Lil' Wayne. Like I can't, I can't go through the... "
Sam: 30:22
Oh, the truth comes out. The truth comes out on a podcast.
Sam: 00:00
We were in line for two hours!
Dee: 30:24
Unbelievable. Yeah. So Kelly was texting with him, and then I realized—like, I went into the bathroom and it was a lot, and I just knew. I was like, "Kelly!" and she was like, "Oh, God, what? What!?"
Dee: 30:44
And I was like, "I'm in labor, I'm in labor. I know I'm in labor. Like, we got to go to the hospital." And she just like—her face. It was hilarious. Because she was like, "OK, OK," and she grabbed her phone and she texted Sam—what'd she say? "More blood."
Sam: 31:01
It was like the worst text she could have sent me. Because, like, I think everything was like, fine. It was okay. Like, clearly, things needed to happen. But she was like, it was like, "More blood. Get on flight."
Sam: 31:14
And that was it. And then never responded again.
Sam: 31:15
And then radio silence. I was like, "What?"
Lisa: 31:20
Oh, no. Great way to make you freak out.
Sam: 31:22
Oh, my God. It was insane.
Dee: 31:24
So I had to go to the hospital and I was—because I was so prepared, I had this running list of things to bring in my hospital bag, and I was not gonna like stray from my list. So I was having contractions, and Kelly was timing them. But I was dead set on putting my bag together, so I was like, "I'm gonna get the shower. I'm gonna put my tweezers and my socks and my iPod" and like this whole long list. And Kelly is just staring at me, and she's like, "Dee, what are you doing?" I'm like, "I'm putting together my hospital bag." And I became very, very calm, like, I think I was a little bit in shock because I just was so freaked out that a) the apartment was in shambles. And then I was...
Sam: 32:16
This is a classic thing for Dee to be freaked out about, that the apartment is in shambles.
Dee: 32:22
Yeah, exactly. You live in a New York City apartment. It's only so big. So there are piles of clothes everywhere. And so I just kept saying to Kelly, I was like, "You need to clean up. Like if I'm leaving and coming home with a baby, this place needs to be clean." She was just like, "What? Like, are you crazy?" So I just was putting together my hospital bag, which, by the way, let's just skip ahead for one second. The only two things—the only two things out of all the things I packed and all the things I had on my list that I used were my water bottle with a flip-top, which you said to bring, because if we were gonna be on all fours or we were going to be in different positions, you could drink your water in any position. And number two was an old fashioned hot water bottle. And those are the only two things that we used the entire time.
Lisa: 33:12
What about the—I have an email. You said an exercise ball, too.
Lisa: 33:16
Yes, the doula brought that.
Lisa: 33:19
She brought that. I thought maybe you didn't bring that. Maybe the hospital had it. Or maybe your doula had it. Yeah. And then you also said Aquaphor. For your lips. That was the fourth thing.
Lisa: 33:29
Yes, exactly.
Lisa: 33:29
That's really important. So I just wanted to be sure to hold you to that, and point that out.
Dee: 33:33
Totally. It was just—I mean the hot water bottle thing was a very last minute add, because you said it was a good way to keep the hot water, or keep the pad hot, right, with water from the coffee machine. And that ended up being great. Because once we got to the hospital, I labored a lot and the doula came right away. I was admitted because I was progressing.
Sam: 34:00
She came right away?
Dee: 34:02
She came right away. Once I went into triage. I remember sitting there and I was like, "I can't believe this is happening, like, Sam isn't here. Like, how is this happening to me?" And, you know, honestly, more than anyone else in my entire life, if there was one person I would want to be there it would be Kelly. And so for her to have been there for those 36 hours, and for that to have happened, I just—that's no coincidence. Like, she was meant to be there for those moments. And I remember when they said to me that they were gonna admit me, I started sobbing and she just grabbed her hands and she's like, "Let's say a prayer. Let's say a prayer right now. Let's just say a prayer." She's like, "We're gonna do this together. Like, you don't have to worry. Like, you're in the best place." and I just then immediately said, "Take my phone. You need to text all these people." Because it was, like, I had appointments next week I had—it was my last week in the office, I'm supposed to do all these things, and so she was just like, "Text people?" I'm like, "Yes! You need to cancel my eyebrow appointment, you need to cancel this appointment, you need to tell my boss." I mean, it was just like, you know.
Sam: 35:01
Why did they decide to admit you?
Dee: 35:03
Because I was bleeding and I had progressed from 1 centimeter to to two centimeters within, like, an hour. So they saw that there was progression happening and I was bleeding.
Sam: 35:12
And you were—you had the...
Sam: 35:15
GPS positive.
Sam: 35:16
So they wanted to get you on antibiotics.
Dee: 35:17
That's right. That's right. Exactly. Yes. So they give me penicillin right away.
Lisa: 35:23
But your water hadn't broken yet? Or it had?
Dee: 35:25
No, my water had not broken yet. So when we—so when they brought us up to the labor and delivery room, that's when Erica came. Erica St. Lawrence, our doula, who was the best. Anyway, she brought the exercise ball, she brought all her little goodies. I got admitted around eight o'clock at night Saturday night. And by Sunday morning, my OB, Dr. Zork happened to be on a 24 hour call starting that day at 6 AM. So she comes in and really—I adore her—she came in and she immediately was like, "Why are you hooked up to all these things ? What? Like, get them off of her." Like, she just looked at the nurse and said, like, "She's had three bags of penicillin. She doesn't need any more. Like, get this stuff off her. Let her walk around." Like, you know. And she even said to me, she's like, "You can go home if you want." But I was terrified. I was like, I'm not with Sam. I'm far, far away from my house.
Sam: 36:17
The snow was still, like, had lingered, so.
Dee: 36:20
I was just like, "There's no way I'm leaving. Like, I just don't feel comfortable, like leaving this hospital right now." But I did walk around, and Erica and I, you know, did all of the things. We had a hot water bottle because I had back labor because she was sunny side up, which means that she was facing up, meaning that I had really bad back labor, and we were on the exercise ball. We were doing all of the things, and I...
Sam: 36:46
Can I ask you a question?
Dee: 36:46
Yeah.
Sam: 36:47
How—what made you decide to go to the hospital? What was the moment that you were like, "I need to go to the hospital right now?" Did Erica tell you to go?
Dee: 36:56
No. Dr. Zork did, because I had—it was like a lot of chunky blood had come out. When I was here. So she, I think, was like, "We need to make sure that you're okay. Like you should go to the doctor and just go get checked." And she even said like, "You might not be in labor. It might just be, you know, from your cervix or whatever," but it was a lot.
Sam: 37:18
Got it, okay, sorry if you'd already...
Dee: 37:20
No, that's okay. Because this is our story. Anyway, so I remember walking around and going through the contractions, and they were really intense and I—but like I felt like they were—I want to say manageable, but, it's not really the right word, but they were. They were. They were manageable. I was walking up and down the hall. Sam at this point, had landed at like—it was probably around noon on Sunday. Did you see Kelly when you arrived?
Sam: 37:48
Yeah. She had to leave. Like I mean, at this point she had to go back. And she's like a teacher. And had to like take care of her child.
Dee: 37:55
Yeah.
Sam: 37:55
And so it was like, the second I walked in, it was like high five, she was out.
Dee: 37:58
Yeah, but at this moment—so it was like probably right when he was calling up in the cab my water broke. And so the funniest thing about the water breaking was that even though I learned—we talked about this in birth class about the different ways that your water, how it can sort of manifest once it breaks, is there was just so much of it. And it was just coming and coming and coming and it would not stop. And it was just—there were towels and towels and towels and water. Just soaking up all the water. And I remember—I think at the same time that I felt the first contraction once my water had broken, Sam walked in the door. And that contraction was—those contractions were next level. I mean, those were the ones where I was like, "Oh, this is what people are talking about."
Sam: 38:51
It seemed a little bit serendipitous that, like the second I walked in, like, things went like through the roof.
Dee: 00:00
Yeah.
Lisa: 38:58
Well, and that's the partner presence. Boost that oxytocin, it'll make those contractions more effective. I love it. That's great.
Sam: 00:00
It was wild.
Dee: 39:05
Totally. And I remember he walked in with, you know, his luggage. He came straight from the from the airport. So he put all that down, him and Kelly kind of high fived and, you know, she left and he took over. And, you know, I wanted to go as long as I possibly could without getting an epidural. I never thought that I was the kind of person that could not have an epidural. I just I always thought that I was—I just couldn't do it. Even if I wanted to. I didn't think I could. And so I—when those contractions started, Erica, our doula said, you know, "Listen, you know, she's sunny side up. These contractions are gonna be way more intense than any other regular contractions. If you want to get an epidural it's okay, but you tell me. Don't let them, you know, sort of pressure you because the first thing that the nurses do—"Do you want an epidural? Do you want an epidural? I remember Sam—the nurses and the doctors were looking at him like he—they were just, like, sort of looking at him cross eyed because Sam was like, "I think you can do another...I think you can do another contraction. Let's just wait until after this contraction for the epidural. Like, it's just—you can do it." And it seemed as though he was sort of pressuring me, but he was doing exactly what I had asked him to do, which was to help me get as far as I possibly could without an epidural. And so he was just like, "You can, you can do one more. You can do one more and I was like, "I can't do one more! I can't do one more!" And then like finally...
Sam: 40:36
Well, what I love...sorry, go ahead.
Dee: 40:38
No, go ahead.
Sam: 40:38
What I liked being able to see is the monitor of the like, the mountains, and of the contractions coming and going, because it's helpful to coach somebody through it to say, like, "You've basically...it's like, you sprinted to the top of the hill. All you have to do is walk down it. Like, you can do it, right?" And then we kept like, saying stuff like that, like, "You're done. You're done. Like, you're good," and then she'd be like, "No, no, I'm not good." "OK, OK, OK" and then like we get down and then like it would start again and we're just like "Go, go, go, go, go, you're almost at the top of the hill. Okay. All right. I have to do is walk down." Like, and I know that for me, like to be like, "Oh, it's so simple. Just get to the top..." But I do think that it helps to, like, see it so you can see what you're, like, you've made it through that. Can you do one more? Just one more. You know, and if you just keep approaching it as, like, one at a time, you can get through.
Dee: 41:33
And then when did you know it was time for for an epidural.
Sam: 41:38
She was just going, she was...she like, kept going "Momma, momma," I don't know if you said this already...
Dee: 00:00
No, I didn't.
Sam: 41:41
Her thing, she kept going "Momma! Momma! Momma! Momma! Momma! Mommy! Mommy!" And Erica, our doula was like, "Wow, that's a new one. I don't think I've ever heard that one."
Dee: 41:54
I was like, "Mamma mia! Mamma mia! Mamma! Mamma! Mommy! Mamma!" And I just—like at that point, it was like—and Erica, like, I know she was, she was definitely trying to give me perspective. She's like, "Listen," she's like, "I don't think I've had one client that's had a sunny side up baby and not had an epidural, like, it's okay." You know, just to sort of like tell me, like, "It's okay. Like, you're incredible amount of pain. Like it's okay. You know, it's still like—you're going through it." So I did get the epidural. I got, like, as light as it possibly could go. I was able to get up on all fours because she was, again, sunny side up. So we were trying to turn her and Dr. Zork was trying to turn her and, oh, man, it was just like...it was a little bit nuts. And then, you know...
Lisa: 42:38
Can I ask you a quick question?
Dee: 42:40
Yes.
Lisa: 42:40
How did you know that the baby was posterior?
Dee: 42:44
They, I guess, checked me?
Sam: 42:48
How would they find out? I actually don't remember.
Dee: 42:50
I don't know.
Lisa: 42:51
Well, usually they don't check that. They just are looking for a head down baby in triage. And so I always recommend that people ask, like, "Can you tell is the baby anterior or posterior?" But usually they don't, without a special request, notice that. So, yeah, I was just curious. And also curious if your doula or anybody suggested any kind of positional techniques to encourage her to rotate.
Dee: 43:18
We did go up on all fours.
Dee: 43:21
Oh, yeah. You just said that, right?
Dee: 43:22
Yeah, we were doing some things, some movements.
Sam: 43:24
I don't remember what, but I remember it like there were a number of things that both the doctor and the doula were suggesting but I don't remember exactly what they were.
Dee: 43:36
I don't either. I think at that point, like I'd been up for—I'd been laboring for—yeah, like 30 some hours at that point. And then I remember Dr. Zork going in and trying to rotate her, but yeah, I think that before—I truly don't remember how we knew, I truly don't.
Lisa: 43:54
And with being on all fours with an epidural, usually that's not something that most nurses or OBs would permit, just due to safety concerns. Was there—with your doula and you, was it sort of "Better to ask forgiveness than permission, and we're just gonna do this and then if they have a problem with it..." or what was that like?
Dee: 44:15
Dr. Zork, who I feel like was, is more progressive than the average doctor was really the one that was there to sort of watch that happen.
Sam: 44:28
Did you have the epidural at that point?
Dee: 44:31
Yes. I'm pretty sure
Sam: 44:31
If that's like something that never happens, then I don't want to say that she did that.
Lisa: 44:35
It's not that it never happens. It's just not as common.
Dee: 44:38
I did it because, well, I'm almost 100% because I remember thinking like, "This is great. Like I'm able to get up on all fours with this epidural."
Lisa: 44:47
It sounds like you said it was light enough that you were still able to feel your legs.
Dee: 44:50
Yes. So and I remember, yes, I'm 100% sure because I remember Erica, like, helping me onto, like, all fours. But yes, a lot of things. Not just—it wasn't that, but Erica, there were a lot of things we said sort of just do and ask for forgiveness later. Number one was eating and drinking. Both pregnancies. I ate and I drank because I was laboring and I needed the energy. And we did it anyway.
Lisa: 45:17
Good for you.
Dee: 45:17
And that was, you know, something that we definitely, you know, just did. But you know, so when it came time to push...so I remember they were—they moved the monitor, they kept losing her heartbeat. So they put, they put the monitor inside, I think on her head, right? Yeah.
Dee: 45:37
Yeah. The fetal scalp electrode.
Dee: 45:39
Yes, that's what they were doing and that was falling out. It was just like, "Oh, God," I just wanted to like have the baby and be done and I remember, you know, they were like, "Okay, you know, we're gonna get ready to push." And Erica said to me, she's like, "Listen, she's like, you may be pushing for a little while. You know, sometimes when people get epidurals, they can't really feel, or, you know, it might take a little bit," and she's like, you know, just kind of sort of prepped us, you know?
Dee: 46:09
Sorry, I have to stop for a second and talk about Erica, our doula. You know, we were very—I wasn't, but Sam was apprehensive about getting a doula because he didn't want to create an us vs. them scenario at the hospital. He really wanted a collaborative team that was working together and in unison. And we found a doula that worked for us, and Erica came highly recommended by Chelsea as well. And Erica used to be a pediatric nurse. So we felt like—and after meeting with her, we felt like we had a team, that she wasn't going to create a situation where we felt like we were fighting the hospital, but also was in a position to remind us of what we wanted our goals to be, and, you know, would make suggestions about, like, "Did you remember? Did you want to do this?" You know, "A, B, C and D." She was just such—mostly she was a huge support to Sam, to be able to tag team with him and to be able to educate him or tell him that, you know, this was about to happen to me. To be able to say to me like, "You know, when the baby comes out, she might—she's gonna have a cone head because she's been sitting in your, you know, in your uterus, or in your pelvic floor for so long. Like, don't worry." She just was such a wonderful support. I mean, she completed our team. So, I just can't say enough about her.
Dee: 47:29
But anyway, so we got ready to push. And literally in one push, it was apparent that like the baby was going to come, because Dr. Zork was like "Oh, okay. Okay. Here we go!" And in three pushes I had her out and it was, like, amazing. Oh, this is hilarious. So there was a mirror and the doctor, immediately before I started pushing, was like, "Do you want the mirror? Do you want to see?" And at first I was, you know, I said, "No, I don't want to see." And then I said, "You know what? This is a once in a lifetime chance. Just bring the mirror over. Let me just look." So I remember, like, looking down and seeing Emma's head, the top of her head, and I pushed once, and her whole head came out, and I just was sort of staring at it. And then I realized, like, what I was looking at, and I started to freak out. And I was like, "Get the mirror away! Get the mirror away!" And so Sam—and the nurses thought I wanted it closer. So they moved the mirror closer, and Sam just kind of leapt out and pushed the whole mirror away out of, like, my sight. And then I ended up pushing the rest of her out, but it was—I felt so grateful that I didn't have a long pushing session because I know that has happened for a lot of people, that they weren't ready, and they were asked to push. And, you know, I just—so you know, she came right out. She had definitely had a cone head.
Lisa: 49:00
It sounds like she did rotate?
Dee: 49:02
She rotated at the a last minute. Yes.
Lisa: 49:04
Oh, awesome. Great. Because yeah, because the pushing stage can be longer if the baby is in posterior position. So when you said it was so short, I thought, "Oh, I bet maybe she rotated."
Dee: 49:13
Yeah. Yes, she did. She did. And then, um and then she you know, Erica helped a lot with the breastfeeding. She immediately went onto my chest. They delayed the cord clamping until Dr. Zork let that thing run all the way out. And Sam was really in charge of, like, making sure that that happened. But Dr. Zork was great about it. She just, I mean, it just kept going until it was completely done. And Erica was there to kind of help the nursing session, which was just, you know, like this brand new baby that's out of my body's on my chest and now suckling on my breasts. Like, how is that possible? And just like that moment. It just, it was incredible. And so, you know, Emma ended up being three weeks—exactly—early. But she was ready. Like she wasn't in the NICU. She didn't need any kind of intervention. She was perfectly healthy and, like, ready.
Dee: 50:14
And I remember—here's another thing, too, that we learned in your class was about not bathing right away, and letting the vernix—right?—the vernix just kind of lay on their skin and be on them, that they didn't need to be bathed. And so I remember they were taking Emma, and Erica goes, "Sam, Dee, did you want Emma to have a bath?" And we were like, "Oh, no, no, no, we don't. We don't." And the looks of the nurses, you know, kind of like, "Uh, they don't...they don't want the baby to have a bath?" "No, they don't want the baby to have a bath. No." And then they would call down. They call down to the nursery. "Yes, well, we're sending Emma, Emma Rose Hendrick down. They don't...the parents don't want her to have a bath, so..." And it was just hilarious, because it was just this sort of subtle judgment, but you know, what was amazing about it is that we got to learn how to bathe her.
Sam: 51:03
Well, I think that either you said that—you may have told us in the class...
Dee: 51:06
She did.
Sam: 51:06
Yeah, that it's, like, it's a good tool to say, like, "We want to do it first so we can learn." Because it also, like, helps it not feel so awkward. But it's great because you do learn how to do the bath.
Sam: 51:15
Yeah. Yeah.
Lisa: 51:18
And you didn't get pressure—sometimes when women are GBS positive, even if they've gotten the antibiotics, there's some additional pressure to do the bath. But you didn't feel like you got that?
Dee: 51:29
No, I didn't even know that. No, no pressure.
Sam: 51:32
Just judgy looks.
Lisa: 51:36
They're like, "Why on earth would you not want that?" Yeah.
Dee: 51:40
Totally. Totally. It was great. Then once we got to, you know, then we obviously got to learn how to bathe her whenever the nurse did it a couple days later. But, you know, that was something that we definitely learned. We're gonna see Luna now. No, but that—you know, that experience was so incredible. There's one piece that I did forget is that when they gave you the epidural, it slowed down my labor, so things sort of stalled, and so they had to give me a little bit of Pitocin. But again, my doctor, who I adore the ground that she walks on, knew how conservative I wanted to be with intervention or anything. And so she was like, "I'm going to give you a tiny bit of Pitocin to just get things moving." Because she knew I didn't want to have a C section. She didn't want it to get to that point because I was GPS positive. My water had—you know, broke. So that helped things move along. But she was very conservative about that. Hi, Luna Tuna!
Lisa: 52:41
Hello, Luna! Oh, look at her! She's grown a lot since I saw her in person.
Dee: 52:49
She did. Luna is like, I feel like our miracle child. She's defied scary moments.
Sam: 53:00
It's just a very different birth story.
Dee: 53:02
Yeah.
Lisa: 53:03
Oh, goodness.
Dee: 53:04
Yeah. With Emma, it was just sort of like everything was very serendipitous. Even—we were calling Emma "Poppy" when she was in the womb, and the, you know, even the, like the room that we had afterwards, we walked in and there's this giant, like, pinking of poppies, and just all these different things that were happening, you know, around Emma's birth that I felt like was very serendipitous. Yeah, but I mean so many things that we learned in your class, we also then applied to Luna, because you forget. You know, even a year later, you forget. And so I opened up that binder I looked at all the links that you had sent. Remember? You sent, like, all the links to your, like, course and articles.
Lisa: 53:46
Too many?
Dee: 53:47
It was great. Hi, Sweetie.
Lisa: 53:51
Well, before we before we move on to Luna's birth, I just wanted to ask Sam, I know you had to duck out a couple times to attend to the little ones, but did you wanna share anything about your experience in the first labor?
Sam: 54:04
Well, I mean, we talked about, you know, sort of coaching through those contractions and stuff. That was—the other interesting thing that I'd say about that Is that, like, Dee was like, "I want the epidural, I want the epidural, I want the epidural," and we were like, "Nah, you're good." Like we kept, like, "You're just—you could do one more." And like I said, when she would get to the other side of it, it was like, she wasn't yelling it anymore. But the nursing staff, it was funny because the nursing staff kept like, looking at her. Really she's—it's her decision, right? But it's like, we're also sort of being, like, "No, she's okay." And it just started to get a little bit awkward, where it was just like, who's trying to, like, call the shots here?
Dee: 54:43
Yeah, oh, my...
Sam: 54:45
She's like, "I want it! I want it! I want it!" I was like, "No, she doesn't. She's good, she's good, she's good."
Dee: 54:51
Because really, after the first, like, two contractions once my water broke, I was like, "Oh, no, I can't. I can't do this. I can't do this." I'm like, "No, no way, cannot be done, cannot be done. " And this is important because it all lends itself to Luna story, which we'll get to, but...Do you want to talk about the actual delivery part, I told her about the mirror.
Sam: 55:14
Oh, yeah. I mean, I just was like, I went into it thinking, "I can't, I don't deal well with, like, blood, I know in my life." So I was, like, worried that I was gonna pass out. That's happened to me in the past where, like, just little things dealing with blood have caused me to have reactions that I totally wasn't prepared for. So I was a little bit nervous about that, and I just, like, it was completely opposite. I was so in it to win it. And my adrenaline was so high that I was just like—I actually felt sad after everything, after the baby...It was like, this strange feeling of like, you're obviously so stoked that you have a new baby and everything, but I was like, "Oh, but we're a team. And we were having a baby" like, "What's the deal? Let's have another baby."
Dee: 56:01
Yeah, yeah, you were sad when it was over. You really were.
Sam: 56:05
I shocked myself with just how none of the visual stuff affected me at all, and I just was, like, so all about the process, and, like just so into, like seeing you do that. I don't know, it was just incredible. It was so, yeah, both births, obviously. And like, I don't know, I don't know. It helped so much to have a doula. That was huge. Like, she was there for so long that, like having—it's so good to have someone to, like, tag team with. But she actually was, like, desperate for me to get there because she needed to sleep.
Dee: 56:43
I labored for almost 37 hours, maybe more.
Sam: 56:43
She labored for so long, like she was taking naps, like, after I got there. And it wasn't like, you know, like—it was great because she would nap for a few hours. And then after, you know, 12 hours later, Dee's, like, sleeping. She got the epidural and it, just, like, knocked her out for a while. And I took a nap, and like to have two people there who were, like, always sort of on it and know what's going on—well, I mean, she knew what was going on. I was another participant. But just to have, like, that extra knowledge, like, I mean, obviously we could do it without her, I think, you know, but like, it would have been a very different, experience, a very, very different experience.
Dee: 57:26
Totally. Because when my blood pressure, you know, monitor was going off, she would just go "boop-boop-boop," shut it off and take it, take off my blood pressure. I mean, I cuff all the time. She would just take it off.
Sam: 57:37
She was also a nurse. She used to be a nurse—did you already say that?
Dee: 57:42
Yeah. So she could talk the talk, and then they were grateful for her, too, because then they wouldn't come in as often and they kind of knew she was taking care of me, so they sort of—the nurses sort of backed off a little bit. And it was a great situation all around. And going back to, like, the mirror and seeing Emma's head come out. I'm so grateful for that moment because I will never, ever, ever forget it. And you know, this idea that we birth children is so impossible sometimes to fathom. And had I not had that moment to see that actually happening... It's just like it still just remains this elusive thing that happened to me, and that sort of makes it real for me, to remember that moment where her head came out of my body, you know, and I just I'm really grateful for that moment.
Lisa: 58:34
All right, so we'll stop there for today, and we'll continue on with Dee's and Sam's second daughter's birth story in next week's episode. After part two. I'll teach on a couple of things that came up in this birth. Here's your sneak peek of what Dee and Sam will share next week.
Dee: 58:48
I remember a friend of mine texting and saying, "You know that tonight is the blue harvest moon. It's the full blue harvest moon tonight and we had already picked out Luna's name. You know, Luna means "moon." And so we just felt very like overwhelmed.
Sam: 59:04
And I was, like, on another level, spiritually, when I heard that I was like, "This is it."
Dee: 59:08
Yes. And so we were like, "Oh, my God, we're having our little moon baby on a rare blue harvest moon." And we just sort of knew like, things were gonna be okay. I don't know, it just became like this, like, baseline for how the next 12 hours went.
Lisa: 59:22
Thanks for listening to the Birth Matters Podcast. And remember to just take it one contraction at a time. Be well.
---END---